From this library visit, I learned how to really use the databases and internet library. I feel comfortable being able to do research from home now and being able to use good credible sources and not having to scan through a pile of books like I thought I would have to. I came in here for my speech class and was shown something similar but nowhere near as efficient and effective. I liked the worksheet a lot because it forced me to look at and look for things I normally wouldn’t have when I was by myself. I found a good tab for MLA formats and work cited and new 2009 revisions I didn’t know. Also I was able to already find a bunch of sources to use for my topic and how to save them so I can access them later. My personal librarian is really nice too; I would feel comfortable asking him for help. I am surely going to use this library website for most of my research findings, to help me find articles and books versus trying to discover all these sources on my own. Also I know that if it’s coming from the JWU library it should be credible? Or at least a lot more credible than Google alone. I liked the concept maps and how it changed every time you clicked on a word, instead of just hovering over it, to a new topic with that word as the center database. I liked looking for different databases instead of credo and academic support because I found one I think would fit perfectly into my topic. It’s opposing viewpoint sin context, how great for a topic like gay adoption rights! I also like that we can get the sources to a certain extent already cited for us. I wish I could have access to this library for the rest of my life to be honest. I love learning and feel like this website will be incredibly useful beyond all beliefs. It’s amazing the technology we’re provided with at Johnson and Wales.
How is Huey’s talk about injustice?
This video was very informative. I was unaware of how many treaties have been made and broken with the Lakota since the 1800s. They have moved to reservations, but what that truly means is that they are now in Prisoner of War Camps. The US has forced these people to live in these camps, simply because of who they are. They now live in the US with no homes or homes with black mold, no electricity, and generally five other people. More than 90% of them are living below the federal poverty line, which was so shocking to hear. I can’t believe we would force these people to live in conditions like this. But more so, their infant mortality rate is the highest in the continent and three times higher than the US average. Where is the justice in this? As well, during the massacre in the 1890s I believe US troops received more metals of honor than any other war or battle: to be specific, even more than in World War 1 and WW2 and even Afghanistan. How is there justice in giving people metals for ruthlessly slaughtering babies, woman, children, and men? I believe the Lakota should have received those metals of honor for just fighting for their life. How can it be that this would occur right after the Emancipation Proclamation was signed this would occur? Apparently there is no “liberty and justice for all”, only the white people of this country who continue to take the best meat for themselves. They deserve to have the Black Hills back, and Huey is right… it is none of our business what they do with it.
Stephensons definition on injustice and justice
Stevenson defines social justice as the opposite of poverty. He says this because our justice system treats people better if they are rich and guilty then if they poor and innocent. When people are unable to pay for an attorney one may be appointed to them, but the quality is far less than deserved and the attorney may have a hard time connecting to the client when they may or may not be really paying them and they also have a mass variety of other cases to tend to. That alone is injustice because where is the equality in that and who is to say that one client deserves better care simply because of the background or family history. Many people do not recognize this as injustice because we become so comfortable with where we are “why should we do anything about it?” To emphasis his point even further, we in America are the only people that are willing to sentence thirteen year olds to prison for the rest of their life. Also, Germans refuse to have the death penalty because of everything that happened in the Holocaust. He talks about the injustice in the ratios of who receives the death penalty, say if the victim is white versus black it is 11 times more likely to happen and if the defendant is black over white it is 22 times more likely to happen. There is so much injustice in this, and is racial inequality leading to injustice. He opened my eyes with a very informative video of all the injustice sadly in our judicial system.
Resolution to conflict, if there is one, in Bastard out of Carolina.
The conflict was resolved when Bone moves out her house with her mother and Glen. Now come to think of it, I don’t really remember what had happened to her sister Reese in the end. Maybe it wasn’t even mentioned for it didn’t have to much direct affect of the end. Bone went to go live with Aunt Raylene who seemed to have grown into one of her favorite Aunts and had no idea where mama and Glen were headed. She thought maybe California or Florida “somewhere a working man could go and ick oranges.”
Mama in the end essentially proved to the reader she definitely got pregnant far too young and wasn’t ready to be a mother, for as much as she loved Bone, and the reader knows this even if they start to doubt it towards the end, she left with “Daddy Glen,” the man who raped and constantly beat her 12 year old daughter. This was the climax as well, when Daddy Glen finally rapes Bone, instead of just touching her. I was hoping with all my might that Daddy Glen wouldn’t have gotten her pregnant, but I guess maybe now looking back that might not be able to happen since she never mentioned a menstruation. There were some other major climatic points around this time, but none worth mentioning immediately because they related to her family mostly. But one of her Uncles promised her vengeance, with unspoken words that he would kill Glen.
Bone changed by being forced to be on her own, and now struggles with the idea of love even more. Too bad her mother couldn’t see that she never really felt loved. Her mother was too concerned for herself and Glen than anyone else. Always “don’t make him mad.” I don’t know if Bone necessarily did learn anything, because she is still mentally struggling badly in the end. She still doesn’t know how Mama or Glen could love her but she knows she loves Mama so badly that before she got raped she told her to be with Glen, she just couldn’t be there as well. It was like an ultimatum “me or him?” without being so mean.
She promised Mama she would never hate her but in the end didn’t know what to feel when her mom so willingly let Glen back into her life, moments after the rape. She didn’t even stay with Bone in the hospital. She never was there to promise Bone when she woke up that she was still loved and it wasn’t her fault. That’s what Bone needed most, was someone to tell her it was not her fault. There is nothing in the world a twelve year old could do to cause such an awful thing to happen to her. She fought and kicked the entire time and certainly didn’t enjoy it, like Daddy Glen had said she’d been wanting it.
She was so confused about the whole situation but at least in the end she ended up with someone who would understand and show Bone nothing but unconditional love. That’s what Bone needed most, was to feel loved, and not just hear some words. How does love beat a child till she’s got a broken tail bone? How does love rape their wife’s 12 year old daughter? It shouldn’t. That love, is sick and twisted. That was not the love Bone needed in her life. Daddy Glen had been so messed up by his own father and felt powerless as a man, so in all his selfish needs, took it out on the smallest one in the family who wouldn’t dare fight back for a long time because she was too scared to hurt her mother.
She still had a lot of thing to learn and realize at the end of the novel, but like the author Allison said in the afterword, she meant to make the reader mad. Because there is no justice in a situation like this in the real world ever. And fiction is more believable than real life, and she was able to make some sense out of something that didn’t make any sense. The ending left the reader feeling just as confused and maybe hopeless as Bone had felt all her life and especially in the last few scenes where all she wanted to do was die. This is what makes this story an incredible one. Making sense out of nothing that should make sense, leaving the reader feeling injustice because we could feel Bone’s pain and really feel it, so when she got screwed over by almost everyone in her life that should have in any normal way made sense (mother, step father) the reader felt screwed. She allowed a deeper connection into the characters than many authors I’ve read ever had. She showed the most intimate thoughts and moments and concerns of life and love, through the eyes of an abused 12 year old, exactly as she saw it. And anyone who ever had been in a situation even moderately close to Bone’s would know that they were reading her thoughts as real and uncensored as they would get, no matter how weird or twisted her thoughts or situation had been. Allison didn’t hold a single thing back from her readers. And I does suck that apparently this book is banned in high schools, or public schools. But I loved knowing that Stephen King and his wife purchased a bunch of novels and donated them to a library to access this incredible book for free. That is a wonderful thing.
Conflicts for Bastard out of Carolina
The conflicts include: being a bastard, being sexually abused by stepfather, being less fortunate when it comes to money, struggling with herself (as a result of being abused and forced to move around a lot and not having the option to have luxurious things).
These are the types of conflicts (in order): man vs society, man vs self, man vs man; man vs self, man vs man; and man vs society, man vs man, man vs self.
Each cause and potential resolution (in order) would be: Anney being unwed when she birthed Bone, and the courthouse being burned to the ground with all of Bone’s birth certificates; Glen is a sick man in need to feel empowered , to receive love with no boundaries, and maybe Bone telling someone and maybe Anney would leave him; Anney marrying Glen and allowing his pride to get in the way of his family’s needs, there may never be a resolution unless Glen disappears or Bone gets a job, or is old enough to move out; Bone struggles with self because of the abuse, being forced to move around a lot, and trying to protect her mother by hiding the abuse and how much it hurts Bone to not have nice things, and maybe even struggles herself with being a bastard cause she doesn’t know her father or anything about him really so she has a lost identity, all could maybe be resolved in different ways such as journaling, therapy, telling someone of the abuse, but I don’t know if she will even attempt to change things for fear of hurting mama.
My favorite scene thus far would be when Bone talks of touching herself to images of fire because there is so much behind that imagery with symbolism and it allows you to see Bone as probably her most vulnerable where nothing could bother her and she just lets her mind go and it directly goes to fire, pain, and potential death. This stuck with me more than any other scene and maybe she wouldn’t have started touching herself if Glen never did first.
This scene is connected to Bone vs Bone, and Bone vs Glen. Bone now struggles with thoughts of if it was her fault, confused, does Glen love her, can Glen love her if he’s doing this to her. Bone struggling with inner questions about Glen would be also in itself a conflict with Glen.
How many times did it happen? For how long did it persist?
Mediation
Meditation
When I think of meditation… I think of therapy. And monks in orange clothes with shaved heads. The word Buddhist comes to mind. I think about finding a quite place with maybe some ambient music like a waterfall or wordless blues. I’m learning study tricks to help me focus and mediate. I think it’s so hard for me to work with music with words because I will allow myself to get distracted. I think of meditation maybe as the quite moments in my head when I relay my day, events in my life, special moments I want to cherish and not share with the world. This usually happens right before bed. I sometimes may meditate in my journal that really is less of a diary with writing of actual events but mostly it has thoughts, feelings, poems, drawings, and quotes that have inspired me. Meditation is the quite time where you can be alone in your own head. Maybe meditation for some would be quite time with God, but I don’t think I’m ready to have someone that powerful back into my head again. Reflecting or meditating on my situation allows me to realize how grateful I am to be alive and have a roof over my head and pretty much food whenever I need it. Meditating on these things allows me to look at life from a more serious perspective that softens my heart to those less fortunate.
Meditation is… for myself when I chose to consciously reflect back on events of my life and even think about dreams I have for my future and how I could get there. Meditation is deep thought. Meditation would probably help one to tap into the stream of consciousness. You don’t have to be a monk sitting around crisscross applesauce and humming the word “ohm.” We all meditate in some way daily without even thinking about it. It’s just reflections of life. Thinking of all the things you wish you could change but are unable to cause it’s just not possible. And in desperate moments you may even mediate on how to build a time machine. Meditation could be self medication. Something one does to keep their own head from exploding. I’m shoving away demons of inner thought right now hoping to be able to further mediate on this question and not allow myself to be distracted. Mediation is not easy, but neither is writing.
My Experience with Meditating
When I was meditating at first it was hard to focus because I couldn’t get comfortable. I wanted to un-tuck my shirt and lay my face on something soft unlike my elbow. I enjoyed having my eyes closed. Easing into it with Prof Harmon directing our breaths was the easiest way that could have allowed me to transition into my place of peace with breathing. A few times I had to control my monkey mind but I let my thoughts wander to finish so I wasn’t tortured. I just didn’t feed into them or question anything further. I liked having the lights off. I was nervous to have no background noise at first, I thought maybe being stuck in my own head with no distractions would make me think about crazy things but the sound of my own breathing was enough. I had to try not to take in too much air cause then when I held it I got reminded of being underwater. I was able to find a breathing pace I was comfortable with. I liked being able to move freely and touch my arms, legs or face. The sensation was more soothing than distracting. I’m glad I didn’t fall asleep but it was nice to know that if I had, it would be okay. It was a nice feeling that my mind was allowed to wander to a certain extent within controlled limits. It felt safe.
Freewrite on Bastard out of Carolina relating to video posts
Freewrite on Bastard out of Carolina relating to video posts
Use specific scenes, do not summarize, and avoid jumping to conclusions-
Allison telling of Bones first (and maybe only) experience with Glen sexually abusing her and how confused she was but didn’t summarize and showed the thoughts of Bone to help the reader to put in her awful situation.
Show contrast between reality and expectations-
Showing that Bone was hoping Glen could be the man Anney needed and then showing him hurt Bone and that it isn’t what anyone, reader or child, had originally thought was going to happen in the car.
Showing conflict- Man vs self
Allison shows a conflict internally with Bone after the incident in the car where she now struggles to find out why it happened, if it really even did happen, and whether or not Glen could really love her ever.
Symbolism- with the fire that Bone masturbates to
I love this symbolism; passion and desire and even the power to save one’s own life would just get one excited and overstimulated in general.
Bastard out of Carolina Freewrite
“People pay for what they do, and still more, for what they have allowed themselves to become. And they pay for it simply: by the lives they lead.” –James Baldwin
I would like to see how this quote fits into the novel Bastard out Of Carolina and why Allison opened her novel with it. I really enjoy this novel and was hooked within the first three pages to be honest. She is so open with her readers and it allows you to really see what was going on and the perspective is perfect for the story, especially with the dialect to pull you into each situation. I am really attached to Bone; but Allison made me fall for Luke, the first husband that passes, first. I was actually sad when he passed which was incredible to realize for he only existed in the story for less than one chapter but the way he and Anney’s relationship was portrayed showed so much love it made me think of a very special man in my life that I would like to marry one day. I was really hurt when Bone got sexually abused by Glen and could actually relate to the confusion and hurt she was going through from an experience in my own life and Allison put it in perspective so well it made me remember my own experience and I wanted to put down the book but I pressed on to see what kind of good could come out of a grown man doing this to a child he claims to love. I hate how controlling Glen is and how insecure he is to ask for help, I would love to see Bone go live with Uncle Earl. I would recommend this novel and I haven’t even finished it yet. Way to go Allison!
success
what defines success? is it being what everyone sees as a productive member of society or could it just be being happy and content with the life one leads?
What is justice?
Justice is people getting what they deserve; mercy is not getting what we do deserve. Justice seems to be found or not found in the judicial system? Justice would be similar to karma. What goes around comes around. Justice is maybe defined by each individual person, from each perspective, but only to a certain extent; because clearly in the situation of a criminal getting his punishment for his crimes and having justice be delivered to society, chances are the criminal is biased and do not feel like they were being treated justly or fairly. Justice is supposed to make sense. If the majority sees it fit, it’s more than likely the closest thing to justice one can receive. Maybe there is no such thing as real justice because how can you say justice has been served to a criminal when they have murdered your daughter and in the end your daughter is still deceased. Where is there justice in that? Justice would be doing the right things, or correcting the way something had been wronged. But even justice cannot undue the past. Justice could be different things for different people in all different situations. Eventually, just like karma, everyone should receive what they deserve for the actions and decisions/choices they have decided to make. But who’s to say who deserves what? A mentally unstable criminal may receive justice or what he needs/deserves is he receives mental help. No disorder excuses killing anyone, but who knows what was going on in their head while they did what they thought was potentially the best decision at the time, otherwise why would they have done it. Think about it in terms of self-defense, how could anyone receive justice in the situation where an attacker gets shot by the victim… the attacker is now dead and his family might feel like no justice is served if the victim gets free, but did the victim receive any justice in killing the attacker and how could you send someone to jail for self-defense in a situation like this. There is no justice in that situation; it would all be a matter of opinion after a certain point.
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